Friday, January 21, 2011

Focusing on Roles-Part 1

So, lately I've been thinking about my focus in the various roles I hold in my little world.....Self, Wife, Mother, Financial Planner, Chef, House Keeper, Friend, Employee...and I've been trying to figure out what exactly my job descriptions for all of those might look like and how I can strive for balance and focus in each area.

I feel like I've got the Financial Planner aspect taken care of.  Jim and I will sing Dave Ramsey's praises until the end of time and we have joyfully welcomed the peace that his plan has brought to our financial lives and to our marriage.

Also, fairly balanced and taken care of is my life as an employee.  My job is something I love and it's working out for now.  It requires a minimal amount of preparation at home and I get to spend my 4 hours a week with some great kids.

The others though, I'm not feeling so great at.  I'm very lucky to have a husband who helps out.  We do not, in my opinion, follow the strict man = provider, woman = caretaker roles.  Overall, our roles are each geared to the traditional way, but we both spend about 25-30% on the other side.  Hubby might disagree, but this is how I see it.

Let me start with housekeeper.  I'm lousy at it.  I SHOULD BE FIRED.  Not because the work I do isn't quality cleaning, but I can just think of a bazillion other things I'd rather do than mop my floors.  I'm no June Cleaver and I'm really OKAY with that.  I've tried schedules and breaking it down and buying fun cleaning supplies and I even had a housekeeper for a few months after AJ was born....but somehow I still always feel behind.  I do realize that having 2 kids (stinky boys) under 3 will make it more difficult, but I'm starting to feel like I really need to get a handle on this.

My area of particular concern in my's become a dumping ground and in no way is a refuge or haven for either of us.

The hubs, usually on the weekends, handles smaller, more day-to-day stuff like doing the dishes, vacuuming and his own laundry.  I am responsible for those too (except his laundry....that's a whole other post), but the bigger stuff like bathrooms, kids rooms, dusting, windows, floors, etc  are my job.

So, for now, my focus is to just keep moving.  During the day, it's sooooo tempting to plunk down on the couch when the boys are playing nicely and just veg.  But the last couple of days, I've actually gotten up and focused on a small task.  I also have started to involve AJ in the process.  The kid LOVES to scrub the toilet, and to spray things with a water bottle.  So, he sprayed and I mopped.  It was perfect :-)

The other part to cleaning that bogs me down, is my need to organize/purge as I go along.  I lose my focus in trying to make those decisions and often bite off a bigger piece then I can manage in my allotted time.  I'm working on this part the most.  I need to tackle de-cluttering as a separate task....particularly in my bedroom.

So, let me you feel like you excel at or could use improvement in this area?  Do you get help from your significant other?

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